How Many Times Can I Say “I Love You”?

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When Your Woman Wants Constant Affection, is that True Romance or Relationship Overkill?

There are some couples that fight about their finances, about something one of their kids did, or about any of the general pressures that come with running a household.

And then there are those couples that fight about passion—or lack thereof.

Everything about the relationship is GREAT, but one person just needs MORE of an already good thing. And, as is the case with anything involving feelings, it’s usually the woman who’s trying to get her man to show a little more lovin’.

But maybe the real question they should be asking themselves is: “What are we fighting for?”

For Your Consideration…

I recently had a heart-to-heart with a couple that seems to be doing everything right: Beautiful home (albeit in the suburbs), a successful family-fun business, awesome kids, and a great sex life (I’d definitely take one of those four).

They brought up a fight they had had a few weeks ago (presumably to get an unbiased and UNCUT opinion).

Turns out, on this particular morning, they were enjoying some early snuggling and smooching in bed, before getting ready to start their day. By the time she had come down the stairs and began to head out the door, her husband was in the kitchen, preparing his breakfast.

She grabbed her lunch and her keys and made her way to the garage. But before stepping out, she blew a kiss to her beloved.

His reaction? He had no reaction. He half-mumbled a “good-bye” while staying focused on his PB&J sandwich.

She slammed the door and walked to her car in a huff, leaving him standing there holding a jar of peanut butter in his hands, with a blank, dumbfounded expression that only a guy can pull off—a look that says, “I know I fucked up, but I’m not sure why.”

Side Note: Dear God, thank you for keeping me single!

The Fear of Becoming One of ‘Those’ Couples

As it was explained to me by the twosome in question, it seems she has this phobia of becoming an “old couple” (translation: stale, monotonous and spark-free). So anytime there’s a missed opportunity to show some affection, she starts to panic.

Maybe she’s right to be concerned. After all, the streets of MarriageVille are littered with stories of couples who’ve lost their spark and are going about their daily routines with the same excitement as watching a pot boil.

On one hand, you can say she deserves praise for always putting her most sexual foot forward. OR, you might argue that her need for grand gestures of amour has more to do with her own insecurities in the relationship.

Two sides of a very complex coin.

couple-fight

Romance, 24/7: Wishful Thinking?

Sadly, married life can’t always be about rose petals and champagne. And once the kids are older, and there’s more “Couple Time” to be had, I can only assume that they have to work that much harder to reclaim the same romantic highs from when they first met.

But does that justify a woman’s need to be swept off her feet every five seconds?

Whether you’re looking for a soul mate, or a 30-min quickie at the closest motel, the truth is that, often times, our fantasy is far from the reality.

But I’ve always maintained that if everything else is still going strong, a perceived dip in your love life is rarely cause for concern. After all, even the biggest flames are just a ‘spark’ away.

Any advice for this aforementioned couple? Share your comment below:

  • Jessica_Scharr

    Can’t take one person’s side over another, but I will say that it’s interesting how some guys can be romantic in the bedroom, but nonchalant (sometimes downright cold) everywhere else!! Being warm and loving towards your girlfriend should take up more than just 30 min a day…just sayin.

    • Mario

      No comment from me except……women are definitely needier than men….just sayin :)

      • Jessica_Scharr

        Men can be just as needy…it’s just not as obvious.

        • Yanks4Life

          Yeah, like 5% lol

  • Lightning Linda

    I think to hear i love you daily is too much and it will become a routine and that gets boring..women need for affection and cling on but just because a man tells you daily what you want to hear doesnt mean he means it..He can tell you just to shut you up lollllllllllllll so dont force and when he tells you show him you appreciate it instead of saying ( really you love me ) lolll oh lorddddd hahhaaa..remember action speaks louder than words..Great article dario!!!!

    • Yanks4Life

      Yup. If your saying it just for the sake of it, then what’s the point??????

  • P_M70

    wah wah wah…girls always crying that it’s never enough. GUYS ARE FUKED NO MATTER WHAT!

  • Caligirl

    Not really balanced. You can tell the author is siding with the guy, and its obvious he’s not good with relationships. IMO, guys have their wandering eye which always gets them into trouble. If they would keep it in their pants and give some attention to the girl they got at home there would be a lot less breakups.

    • http://bacheloruncut.com/ Bachelor Uncut

      I’m guessing this is your first time on this blog? ;) Otherwise, you’d know that I admit to sucking at relationships. And not sure I get your analogy between cheating and giving a girl attention 24/7. Sounds to me like you just got out of a rocky relationship…let’s discuss!

  • joanna

    My ex bf used to tell me i was too clingy just cause i liked to cuddle in bed and sneak a few kisses whenever he walked by.

    • Yanks4Life

      poor guy lmao