Fifty Shades of Confusion

Saints or Sinners? What is it girls really want and why is it so damn complicated?

“He’s too rough.”

“He’s into some crazy shit.”

“He’s too dominant.”

BEHOLD: The retorts of sexually unsatisfied women everywhere who complain about their overly-horned-up men, while grumbling that there are no “normal, nice guys” out there.

It’s the ongoing struggle between the sexes: Women looking for intellectually-stimulating romance from a gender (i.e. males) that cares more about physical gratification than anything else.

But every so often, these same females will let their guard down, and do or say things (or fall over themselves reading a certain novel) to suggest that they’re more like guys than they let on—whereby “too rough” could really mean “not rough enough.”

And just like that, poems, chocolates and flowers suddenly seem irrelevant.

Christian Grey: Fact or Fiction?

Now that the trailer for “Fifty Shades of Grey” has been released, and millions of women have once again whipped themselves up into a frenzy (one that will surely last till the movie premieres in February 2015), you have to wonder:

Do they, deep down, want this cinematic fantasy to be their reality?

Sure, you can say that is just a momentary form of escapism for women that has no basis in the real world. But what if it did? Would it be such a bad thing?

What the F*ck Do Women Want?

In full disclosure, I haven’t read these ‘Grey’ books, but know enough about what the pages dive into (eroticism and sexual dominance) to know that their popularity could mean women are more open (FINALLY!) to letting themselves go—sexually anyway.

Only Problem? Finding a chick to actually come out and admit that she wouldn’t mind spending her Friday night tied up and blindfolded.

Perhaps she’s still holding onto that tired, politically-correct need to be a proper wife and mother, one who doesn’t lower herself to degrading acts of perversion (puh-leeze!).

And if this is true, and women won’t let themselves give in to their basic carnal desires, aren’t we just running around sexual circles?

With Men, One Thing is VERY Clear…

Guys want whores. Period. They may put up varying fronts that suggest they’re looking for smart, calm, maternal-types, but in the bedroom, even the shyest, most reserved man won’t object to having a woman swing from the chandelier or drip hot wax on his chest (if people are still into that shit).

That’s the beauty with men; there is no ‘grey’ area when it comes to sex—the kinkier and dirtier, the better.

It isn’t so far-fetched to presume, then, that if women would—at the very least—meet their insatiable significant others halfway, it could change the art of slamming forever.

Could this be the new norm?

S&M shouldn’t stand for “Sappy & Mundane”

Imagine a world where men and women spoke the same sexual language…where nothing was too rough or too kinky…and where domination was a sign of affection.

Think of the fewer cases of cheating, how much lower the divorce rates would be, and, most importantly, how this x-rated philosophy could explain why gay men have the best sex lives of all. Just sayin’…

It’s a world I’d like to think would be made up of Fifty Shades of pure, unadulterated gratification!

So…do women want more Christian Grey in their men than they let on?
Share your thoughts below.